Sutherlands Get Random - 4.2

 

Last time Gen 4's main couple Carl and Sangria, aka Cargria, got married. The household remains dressed for the occasion.

Rivella: Oooh, back crack...I'm still young and bendy, right Kezia?

Kezia: Shut up and go to sleep you had way too much wine. Or should I say whine?

Rivella: 'S wrong choice for her...

Kezia: Yeah yeah.


Then we have Sangria writing a new book in her wedding dress which is kind of iconic...

Sangria: I did it...I had my wedding...things are gonna be perfect now.


Hey Pepsi.

Pepsi: On my way to steal their man.

Pepsi no, that's your grandson in law basically.

Pepsi: Lol since when do they invite men to live here? As if!


Sangria: I just don't know why I feel so sick...and achy...and I need to piss like a horse oh my God-


Sangria: Well why the hell not I guess? Have sex ONCE and get pregnant! Amazing. Here I was saying my life was going to plan...now I'll have to put things on hold and-

Nah. Riv and Kezia can help you guys raise it.

Sangria: That's even WORSE!


Sangria: Guess what we're having a baby!

Carl: But I USED protection...did I? Can't remember. Oh well, this is a disaster.

Sangria: It might not be all bad! We can still go to university and make this work...my Mum could even-

Carl: Yeah, no.


Kezia: I know that look. Lemme guess, it wasn't too much wedding cake.

Sangria:...No. Things are happening sooner than I thought.

Kezia: Nothing goes to plan. There I was chilling in the netherworld when suddenly I was pulled through dimensions-

Sangria: Goddammit Kezia I have enough problems without your shitty stories.


Alexei: Could she hurry up and get one of these little shits off my hands?

Now that she's officially knocked up Sangria needs to adopt her pet for the generation...


Sangria: Oooh aren't you the cutest ever! I love you already.

Flash: Calm down lady we just met.

Tommy: Meheheheh I'mma mess up your house.


Sangria's hand:  *claws*

Tommy: Smells like chicken. Changed my mind I wanna keep her.


Tommy: Stop no pictures!


Flash: Cool so they just keep old pipes around. Very fun.

Hhhhh they're so CUTE I wish I could keep both!


Alexei: What? Your trash needed taking out. Also even painting in her pyjamas your sister's hot.

Sangria: Do I look that old? Because she doesn't look young. She's sort of my auntie actually-

Alexei: Whatever woman, have you picked one of these things or not?

Sangria: Well you're a barrel of laughs huh?

Alexei:  Hm. I try my best.


Sangria: It has to be you, Tommy. You're the sweetest.

Tommy: Mmmm...chicken.


Tommy: Hhhh floor is good floor is life.

I'm gonna try to not turn this post into kitten spam.

Tommy: This is the best way to do running practice!


Alexei: I'm already dressed for it...so what say you put on your hottest dress and we go out on the town?

Kezia: It's 8am, dude. San pick a cat already and get him out of here.

Alexei: She picked half an hour ago. I'm definitely supposed to be back at the shelter now. But you're worth it girl.


I was making Carl skill when I saw Tommy YEETING himself out of the living room.

Tommy: Ohhhhhh man there's some horrible loud box in there!

The stereo?

Tommy: Call it what you like I'm gone fam!


Rivella is trying to show her softer side.

Rivella: *jingle jingle* Come play with me you wretched thing!

Tommy: *keeps hiding behind desk*

Rivella: Don't be insulted! It's just a little joke! Why you're the cutest little cat in the world, even compared to Onyx - and I really hope you hear it!

It also just occurred to me that Rivella's the only family member who's met all three cats of the Randomcy.


Kezia: Looks like I did put on a pretty dress. But not for you, Alexei. Never for you.

Attagirl.

Kezia: Lemme guess, back to painting now?


Sangria: At least I got into the program I wanted!

She's gonna go for Language and Literature.


TOMMY. God the kittens in this game are too stupidly cute!

Tommy: Bet I'm not the only one who's passed out here before, ha ha ha-


Carl: OK maybe it's the electric shock or a random episode but I'm pretty sure somebody's landing a rocket in the backyard.

Rivella: Falling with style!!!!!

Carl: I didn't even know you could do that! God I love this place.


Annika: Heard you had a wedding. Heard you didn't invite me. I just wanna talk.

Sangria: Now before we converse I will inform you I'm pregnant, don't hurt me-


Carl: Hhhhhh OK I think that was an electric shock.


Carl: Bedpan fish fork? Dancing queen!

Annika: Never mind I'll get to her somehow.

Carl: Stalker! :)


Kezia: Are you gonna help me get my arm out of this chair? Yes? No? What's it gonna be boy?

Carl: Oooh who're you?!

Kezia: Dammit I told 'em that robotics table needs better shock protection!


Sangria: Uh honey I think you're smoking.

Carl: And you're even hotter San, come here-

Sangria:As much as I'd love to put our knowledge to the test again...I don't think you're in the right shape for this.

Carl: There may have been a small electrics incident.

Sangria: OK. Raincheck. Because trust me I am still horny.


Tommy: I sense human kittens.

Sangria: Well yes, Tommy! Good boy. I bet you'll be a great friend to my children.

Carl: Nice cat. Good cat.

Sangria: That's my hair you're patting Carl, the cat's further down.

Tommy: Yes. I am very small. Your kitten-father is an idiot.

Sangria: Well...


Kezia: Can't believe out of the two science nerds, you're the worst off.

Rivella: Space mud is really hard to scrub off.

Kezia: Really? Cos this smells the same as the mud your vengeful ghosts used to trek in.


Sangria: Carl! The baby!

Carl: It's fine I won't drop you-

Sangria: Not that! Tommy just expressed a boundary and he's right here!

Carl: Tommy can leave, the door's open.

Tommy: Mmmm...too lazy to move.


Eventually the cat left, Sangria got over it and they had more shower WooHoo.

Carl: I am the man!

Sangria: Oh God what if I got pregnant...wait, that's not right-

Carl: Read up some more, babe?

Aperol finally got off his ass and married Kristine, while Kevin married a San lookalike. Sorry, San's cousin, so Grenadine's daughter. I hope they're happy because I have a soft spot for all four of these Sims.


What are you scared of here Tommy?

Tommy: Nothing it's just ugly!


Tommy: I wanna monch...I wanna cronch.

Goldfish: O__O

Koi Carp: Anything to end this suffering. *swims right at the glass*


Carl: Oh my God this is all happening so fast! She's huge.

Sangria: Bad move, Carl.


Sangria: GreatGrandma Nic please get out of the sink. I've got enough going on.


Carl: Repairwork in my underwear...I've heard that's a turn-on-

Sangria: Good kitty. Cute kitty! Tommy you're the best!

Tommy: Haha suck it Carl!


Rivella: What is he doing...

Carl: It's all for science, Ms. S! Anyway, a little birdie told me it's your sixtieth soon! Let's make it special.

Rivella:...I would prefer not to acknowledge that. And put on a shirt.


Carl: Well good morning, San!

Sangria: Ooh, you look so good, once I'm done with this homework we'll definitely-

Kezia: Yeah, a sun-starved skin tone and untoned chest, I'm sooo impressed. Stop being newlyweds all over our house, please.

Carl: She's just jealous she's been doing nothing but assisting Rivella all her life.

Kezia:...Get out of here quick before I kill you.

Sangria: I'd listen if I were you, Carl. I want my kid to have its father.


Tommy: I smell treats. Lots! Oh cabinet of wonders...

Rivella: Step away or I punt you.

Sangria: Woooow Mum I wonder why he's afraid of you.

Rivella: I talked like that to Onyx all the time and he was my best friend!

Carl: See Kezia. She doesn't even value you. This is who you've served.

Sangria: Carl I told you not to poke the bear.


Josiah: So who's the woman? Just 'cos you knock someone up doesn't mean you gotta be attached to them.

Carl:...This is my wife, Sangria. I married her before any of this. Not all men are like you, Dad.

Sangria: Yay. I'm so happy to be a buffer between you and your deadbeat father, Carl.

Josiah is an Evil sim after all. Were it in the cards for her, Rivella definitely would have been a match for him.

 He was very cute in his youth.

Josiah: See? I gave you something after all. My looks.


Josiah: Huh, they're already boring me. Well, I tried.

Sangria: Did you really Mr Thorpe?

Anyway they're at GeekCon. I would rather not be but the generational goal requires we attend EACH ONE of these fesitvals.


Gene's here also.

Gene: Just watch out kid. Sure you're happy for your marriage and baby NOW,  but what about in thirty-five years when you have three ungrateful daughters and a wife who won't leave the gym-


Cooper the Vendor: Lol what.

Llama Triumvirate: We have melded, now may we have a discount?

Cooper: Eeeehhhh, probably not.


Sangria: My sweet husband-

Carl: OW my shoulder!

Sangria: You go, baby! Crush that gaming challenge.

Carl: No seriously I think I dislocated something, can we go to the ER?


Lucian: UGH my son is a disappointment and I lost all my hair in a work accident! This day can't get any worse.

Quinn: It can't be too bad! Bald buddies!

Lucian: And I don't even have money for a good toupee.

Lucian is Bellini's father-in-law I'm pretty sure. And Quinn is Gene's brother.

Anyway after Carl was done we went home cos we only have to be there for an hour.


Wow! These two are already having trouble!

Kristine: No Aperol I can't make you cool. There's no spell powerful enough for that!

Aperol: Well that's just insulting!


Sangria's home from her one and only class of the day.

Sprite: I see how it is. I deign to come to this boring suburb and this is the thanks I get.

Sangria: Guess what I'm pregnant! :)

Sprite; Ugh. How basic.
 

Sprite: This place is boring and you don't have any of the good radio stations.

Kezia: You can leave then, nobody will miss you.

Sprite: I kind of...

Kezia: Let me guess. You're on the out-and-out with Rocio. God none of you kids can have healthy relationships, San already got those texts from her brother...

Sprite: Whose fault is that do you think?


Speaking of San's brother..

Aperol: My house is a minefield. Literally. Never marry a spellcaster.


Tommy: This trash is a goldmine! Maybe I can finally eat, oh boohoo sob.

Don't eat trash.

Tommy: Then feed me.

AHEM look over there!


Lux: Wooow who broke that sink? Somebody should fix it *cough*

Tommy: Lady I saw you break it.

Lux:...Sugar? Is that you?

Tommy: You don't know me well enough for nicknames!


Tommy: I'm gonna get that chicken. And bite that lady somehow, even if she's see-through.


Sangria: *sniff* I'm enormous! There better not be more than one in there I SWEAR!

Actually nobody in this family has had twins yet so...you should be in luck?


Tommy: Hmm? That's all the loving I get then?

Sangria: Bitch I'm so pregnant you're lucky I bent over for your tiny self at all.


Sangria: Carl you need to shower more and stop digging around in trash heaps, you smell terrible.

Carl: Le gasp! This is my natural musk.

Sangria: No it ain't, or I wouldn't have married your ass.

Carl: Well maybe I've just been hiding my true scent with deodorant. Do you want me to do that all my life?

Sangria: Yes! Wear deodorant! You know how weak my stomach is.

Carl: Pussy.

Sangria: CARL

Carl: Seriously he's right there.

Tommy: Don't bring me into this.


Kezia: Playing in trash again boy?

Carl: I just fixed most of this bathroom after some ghost rampaged through it so...not really? You try it and then sass me.

Kezia: Y'know what? I actually don't mind you. You're more interesting than San, that's for sure.

Carl: Thank...you?


Rivella: Haha! Look, my pretties, I've invented the fuckin' sun.

Dr F: That's my protege right there. At least, the best I got.

Chef Gino: Better to make something to eat?

Elmira Clamp: Hmmm. I won't entertain it. I shall just read the same book as ever.

Rivella: Jeez woman it's been about 50 years of that book now, hasn't it?


Carl got into his distinguished degree! So he's gonna enrol in Physics ASAP.


Sangria's back from her classes. So they're doing homework together which is sort of cute.

CaSangria: I notice you're doing some university homework, dear...

Carl: Yeah! I'ma bout to go to Physics classes! I will miss using that Robotics table all day every day though...

Sangria: Sweetie maybe it's for the best. For one thing they might teach you how to safely use electrics!

Carl: Eh, those guides are for suckers.


Sprite's father died. RIP you boring deadbeat.

Seriously the most interesting thing about this guy is that later in life he and his wife adopted a kid named Jace Ventura.


Carl:...I'd love to, but how's it gonna uh...fit?

Sangria: Dear? Surely I'm not that whale-like and enormous?

Carl: Your words not mine. I guess I'll figure it out.

They figured it out. And had fun too, at least according to need bars!

Sangria: *sigh* Wide load coming through...must he put his huge presentation board right there?


Kezia actually went out to talk to people and I was so surprised I let her do it.

Kezia: Right, so...woman who Pepsi wanted to bang, woman whose husband Pepsi banged, and a man who's not halfway bad looking, what a crew.

Valerie: Do you always talk to people like this?

Nylah: Say what about my husband?


Vikram: You ain't hard on the eyes either.

Nylah: Vikram you SLUT.

Valerie: Oh please get off your high horse, when one sees hotness they can point it out. That being said I don't know what he's talking about.

Nylah: Maybe you and your belly shirt should get out of here, Valerie, you're 80 fucking years old.


Carl: I'm being drowned by homework! I can't deal with this anymore! And there's a BABY, there wasn't supposed to be a baby yet!

Tommy:...I'm concerned and yet can't stop watching.


Sprite was apparently here again.

Sprite: Not only did my Dad die, these assholes just ignored me. She was supposed to be the good one.

Aperol: Relative to this family. Now, I really need to get away from the house. Who would have known hooking up with, impregnating and shotgun-marrying your high school gf out of nowhere in your 30s has consequences.

Sprite: God Aperol I don't care about your sad life. My Dad is dead!

Aperol: So is mine. And you didn't even know yours.

Sprite: Neither did you but you whined all your life about it!

Sangria: So..

Aperol: Oh San! You're way too young for a baby...now where's the man who did it?!

Sangria: I'm an adult and the father is my husband. Carl. You've met. You were at our wedding.

Aperol: Well I do wanna feel some power so-

Sangria: Aperol don't try and fight my husband. I am not afraid to kick you out of my home.


Rivella: Do you mind not watching me compete? It's giving me performance anxiety.

Carl: That's not what...anyway, I'm just doing my homework. San is asleep in our room and she needs her rest..

Rivella: Then go somewhere else you freak, it's a pretty big house.


Bellini's dad got married again.

Bellini: I was excluded, as I have been from most of his life :)


Gin-Fizz, in this truly inexplicable outfit, gave birth to a rarity in this family - a single baby boy! He's named after Bailey's, obviously. The naming theme for her kids is drinks that could be real names.


Just after that Sangria popped.

Sangria: Carl wake up it's go time.

Carl: No don't put the bag on my head, I'll be good. Please let me stay alive.

Sangria:...I'll bring that up later. CARL! Drive me to the hospital.


Carl: OhmyGod ohmyGod ohmyGod!

Sangria :Watcher above, help me! Also Carl shut up you're not the one pushing it out of you!


All the while tonight's ghost Pepsi sits on the computer and gives zero fucks.

Pepsi: Haha what a funny joke.

Sangria: It's not a joke, Clonema! I'm having my baby!

Pepsi:That wasn't...oh whatever, well done dear. And do it quieter please. I just missed half this episode!


After the birth...

Sangria: Woo! I got my full range of motion back! Lookit!

Carl: Oh LORD I understand why you scream at me when I do this now! Please don't drop me!

Sangria: You falling on your head wouldn't make a huge difference dear.

Carl: Well I never!


This is Kahlua Sutherland, first baby of Generation 5. As you can tell from the onesie SHE did not break the family trend of baby girls. But, y'know, still cute.


Sangria: Sweet Kahlua. I will ensure you grow up great and successful and not messed-up like everyone else this family produces!

Pepsi: Good fuckin' luck with that, kiddo.

Sangria: Language!

Pepsi: Girl please.

Kahlua: Can you actually feed me tho.


Carl: So Kezia. We had our first baby. One more than you'll ever have, you old bat.

Kezia: Gimme a day or so before that transition, dear. And just you wait. Your Erratic qualities plus Sangria's squeamishness and neuroticism is gonna make one interesting set of kids.


I apparently missed the birth notification but at some point Aperol's wife must have had their kid.

So Miss Kristine basically named the kid after herself.

Aperol: What??? Do you think I have the clout to do anything about that?


Carl: Our baby isn't trash, right?

Sangria: What kind of question is that? She's a baby and she's fine, sleeping upstairs all happy-

Carl: Anyway speaking of trash I found some really cool wiring in the hospital dumpsters.

Sangria: Carl you can't have garbage as a personality trait. I'm putting my foot down.


Carl: You want attention! Fine, you may have attention! I shall hold you in your hands and not let go...

Tommy: Nvm fam I'm good.


Sangria: Don't you listen to my silly husband! He's just teasing you! Now let me give you kisses and cuddles.

Tommy: Ow woman my face!

Sangria: You're the best kitty! The best! You deserve all the kisses!

Tommy: Seriously you're pressing your face right into my eyeballs!


Kezia: Well where are your useless parents now, Kahlua? That boy wants to make fun of me for being 'support'. Well his little wife wouldn't have survived without me helping raise her...and now it seems like his daughter won't either.

Kahlua: Is the rambling before food a thing with you people or?


Like five minutes after that Kahlua's parents came home and did it in the observatory so...yeah, maybe Kezia has a point.

Sangria: Third time's the charm! This is just getting better and better!

Carl: GOD I hope I didn't get you pregnant again we are so NOT READY for that!

Sangria: Don't even speak those words, Carl. You might will it into existence.

Carl: If I can do that then surely I can un-will it?

Sangria: We have that, it's called an abortion.


I normally don't accept these invitations but I was curious about Bellini's lovely little suburban life with her two children. And Wiki.

Wiki: This was my late husband's house first.

Bellini: Well we're both too broke for lawyers, Wiki, so we can be housemates who hate each other forever.

Johnny: God I wish this wasn't my life.

Prosecco: God same Father.

Johnny: Don't associate yourself with me.

Cava: Lol my family is messed up.


Sangria: Wow Johnny.You look as big of a douchebag as I remember you!

Johnny: Sangria don't. I'm not in the mood.

Sangria: Shit. Life with my sister really broke you down huh. Not like that was a surprising outcome tho.


Outside was way more interesting.

Cava: So does this happen a lot?

Prosecco: Once or twice? I dunno. Can you get me popcorn?

Cava: I don't know what that is or how to make it. I'm three.

Prosecco: Eh, guess it was a longshot.

Bellini: Get off my back you wrinkled bitch!

Lilly: Raaahhhhh!

Jacket Dude: Hell yeah! Punch her in the tit!

Who are you rooting for here guy?

Prosecco: I'm fifty-fifty.

Not you Prosecco.


Bellini: Now get off my lawn bitch!

Lilly: What the hell? I just wanted my bicycle back!

Bellini: It's my bicycle! Johnny's rules are finders keepers!


Johnny: My life may be sad and pointless but damn all I see cake.

Carl: Why thank you, I know my ass is flawless.

Wiki: Fucking sigh, he says that all the time. He thinks it's funny.


Sangria: Carl stop being thirsty for attention, you  get plenty from me. And Johnny what the hell. Your kids are here.

Prosecco: It's OK Aunty San. I'm used to stuff like this. Mum just had a brawl over a stolen bicycle.

Bellini: Exactly. I do a lot for you. So maybe stop being such a whiny brat and accept your life is pretty good. I mean you've got an awesome wife with the real cake here-

Johnny: Yeah but I can't see it.

Bellini: I can stand up, that's the stupidest excuse ever

Wiki: Do you see now why I want these people to leave?


Back at home...

Rivella: Hey! You are what you eat! So don't eat fucking trash OK! Stupid...and I can see you thinking about nipping my ankles. I can and will kick you so don't try,
.
Tommy: O__O

Rivella:...No comeback then? Gawd I miss Onyx even more with your wimp ass around.


Yay Ribena's pregnant.  That's the first grandchild for Grena.


And also, this. Johnny, Prosecco and Cava should be afraid for their lives.


And then Sprite and Rocio adopted this teenager who I renamed Squash. I feel a bit bad,. It's one thing to rename a baby but...a teen? 

Squash: Why couldn't I have just stayed Rosemary?

Sprite: We have a theme going here, honey.


Tommy is finally using the litterbox. Given how long it's been...

Tommy: Well the everything about this household scared me into constipation for like three days.



She is a hybrid and got the purple skin! I've been having a glitch in which all babies have the darkest human skin in the portrait bar, and I guess that must carry over to family trees. So yay Syrup, you pulled through and exceeded my expectations for Grenagene's babies.


Carl: Damn girl you got cake in that underwear!

Sangria: Yes yes, my ass is perfection, but if you start talking like Johnny goddamn Trivedi I will divorce you so fast! :)

Carl:...Note taken, dear wife. Note taken.


Onyx was out tonight apparently.

Onyx: Hell yeah I was. This new place is as much of a mess as the old one...I love it.

You would.


Welp the dreaded six-oh hit Rivella then.

Rivella: OW CRAP, my BACK!


Rivella: Well this sucks. Not only am I old, my stupid asshole best friend ghost cat was right about this place. What the hell happened? No way Carl needs a lake for his science.


Kezia: OW my entire body just fell through a wall.

I had Kezia follow her best friend/life companion/distant descendant into elderdom via cake. Somehow she teleported through the house while doing so.

Kezia: We need makeovers. You need to stop doing ridiculous things to your hair and let it be wavy and normal and I need to - I need to look fucking flawless, which I'm already doing. No changes needed.

Rivella: In your dreams ho. You should have dropped at least twenty pounds before you got old, cos now you'll never work it off.

Kezia: Oh you...seriously stop it with the styling products. They take up so much space in our room.

Rivella: I'm not complaining about your paints am I?

Kezia: Well who makes money? When was the last time your arthritic fingers won a game prize?


They got their makeover.

Kezia: I got it! We can be the Bathroom Biddies!

Rivella: What's gotten into you? Absolutely not, let's leave that cheesy crap to the next generation!

Kezia: Sorry, s'pose I just got carried away. It doesn't show here but I will be primarily in sweats for my EVERYDAY OUTFIT.

I felt like slobby Kezia deserved that after years of slaving at the easel for us.


San and Carl are back from their classes.

Carl: I do say we are crushing Uni, right San?

Sangria: Absolutely, dearest. Even with the baby things are going just fine...which got me thinking.

Carl: Mmmm yes, pray tell me your thoughts!

Sangria: So Mum and Kezia won't be around forever. And I want more children. So we should do it now while we have some help. Someone to feed the kids when we've got lots of homework.

Carl: I think you're quite right. I'm happy to get you pregnant again, San!


And so they did it in their classic location! Don't think they've used their bed even once.

Tommy: Jesus Christ why me, I was just trying to take a shit!


Tommy: I now know too much about human mating rituals. More human-kittens?

Sangria: Why yes! Another darling child!

Tommy: Girl you're probably making a mistake.

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