Gael (Bos's childhood 'friend'): Uh Mister, your w-
Elin: Don't you dare, kid, or everything you love will disappear.
Gael: OK noted, damn!
Kian: Wow, Elin, that was so sexy.
Elin: Wha?
Elin: Wha?
Gunther: What the hell is going on?
Elin: Kid...
Gael: Meh, whatever, I have no investment in this. Why am I even here?
Dji: See, random dude, they're so mean to me!
Den: He doesn't care, dummy.
Cam: *snicker*
Gael:...Well...I really don't care though.
Kian: WHOO that was good!
Elin: Meh.
Den: Oh if only I had a camera...I could have got some real blackmail material.
Elin: And that's why I'd never buy you one, my dear.
Elin: *aims spray bottle* Now get out, your work here is done!
Kian: *doesn't matter, had WooHoo*
Elin: Uh...why?
Bret: Well, I'm being forced to cover someone's shift, but I really wanna fuck...I mean see you again, so...how about it?
Elin: Burn in hell, Bret.
Kian what the hell.
Kian: *probably about to steal something*
Gunther: Haha...this table is great...what is my life...
Elin: Never mind that. Let's go have sex.
Gunther: Uh...
Elin: Outside!
Meanwhile, Cam has also been banished outside...
Cam: There are no sounds apart from those of the violin.
Cam: I absolutely CANNOT hear anything else.
Dji: Oh, wow! Wow! What's gonna happen next! Ooh, and this sandwich is so good-
Den: I'm gonna beat your ass if you say one more word. Be wholesome quietly.
Dji: *sigh*
Cam finished Creativity...in a cloud of her own stink.
Cam: Very inspirational!
Whatever, just go shower, you weirdo.
Elin: Meh.
Baby G is officially on its way!
Gunther: Oh good, yet another kid. *unenthusiastic kissing*
Elin: Meh.
Dji: *snicker*...wait, oh God, not another one-
Elin:...Is this worth it?
Um...what.
Cambodia being done with her skills means that she is being used for Egypt's skills.
Egypt: Should I convince Dji to tell everyone I'm a vampire while I refuse to back up the story myself?
Cam:...Sounds good!
Gunther: I'd rather you didn't stand in that, it was expensive, and-
Fiji: Well I'd rather your face weren't so ugly but we can't always have what we want, can we...Father.
Gunther: ...Erm, Fij-
Fiji: I went too far, didn't I?
Gunther: Kind of.
Fiji: I regret nothing.
Den: Salad? What a loser!
Egypt: I know whose blood I WILL be drinking...
Dji: Heh...you're not actually going to do that, are you?
Den: I'd definitely watch.
Egypt: I'd make you pay to.
Gunther: My wonderful youngest daughter...what would you like?
Fiji: Cards! Anyone could trounce you in poker, even me, and I'm a BABY!
Gunther: OK, I'll grab the flash cards.
Fiji: Coward!
Gunther: -y'know, at least I can use a real toilet-
Fiji: You're an adult. That's not an achievement. I, however, am a baby. So I'm cut slack because of my age. Ain't that great?
Elin: Maybe I should barf onto the plants and tell Gunther one of the kids did it.
Not a good idea.
Elin: Not that he would do anything about it, that weakling...
Don't fuck with Azaranda, MCCC. Besides, they don't even have any kids between them. WTF?
Elin: She will be the best child I have...
Fiji, on the floor somewhere: I don't need your approval!
Elin: What? No? I mean my rocket. It's practically my baby. It's only been finished for an hour and a half but if anything happened to it I would kill this entire household...probably not myself though. I like me.
Fiji: You are the only one worth anything, bear.
Blueffy: *solemn nod*
Cambodia has maxed out her skill and has her A. I'm leaving her on total free will until she's had an A long enough to age up. She has chosen to use her freedom by standing on the sidewalk. What an interesting Sim...
Fiji: If you puke on me I will throw the food.
Elin: Throw it! Not like I have to clean it up!
Gunther, just offscreen:...Oh, but I'm busy - yes dear.
Elin: Fuck all of these useless children I've birthed! My God they're dumb!
They are. They're Sutherlands. They can't help it. Now stop smashing the dollhouse and fix your damage!
Elin: *kick* Make Gunther do it.
NOPE.
Elin: Sorry, but who are you again?
Denmark: My brother is WHAT?
Cam: Over a level ahead of you in his skill. Egypt told me.
Egypt: It's the vampire in me, you see.
Denmark: *solemnly chews on his spoon* Hmmm...how can I rectify this?
Egypt: Wow. Dji had a win. Maybe we could just let him have this one.
Egypt: I can also see the future.
Cam: wHAAAT?
Gunther: Seriously? Again? Aren't these supposed to be good-quality computers? I'm nearly done with this novel, can I-?
Elin: *death-glare* Know your place!
Meanwhile, Den and Dji skill outside.
Dji: Soaring....flying...
Den: Wow, you...holy shit that's actually cool!
Dji: Why thank you! :)
Elin: Bret! I don't want to get high with you!
Bret: Sure. Be boring. Coop up at home with your kids.
Elin: Oh, no, I'd happily go get high with someone else. It's specifically you and the fact that I don't like you, Bret. *hangs up*
Egypt: -you're gonna meet someone who loves your violin playing and doesn't force you to wear pink face-paint-
Cam: Sweet!
Egypt: Your future is looking good :).
Bos: Surprise, bitch.
Elin: And a good evening to you, Bosnia. What the hell are you doing back here?
Bos: Nice to see you too, Mother.
Elin: Seriously WHO ARE YOU?
Marcus: I'm Marcus, we have a ki-
Elin: Don't call this number again!
The next morning...
Gunther: OK, let's get you on the potty.
Fiji: You don't own me, little man.
Gunther: *sigh* If you do this, you can grow up sooner and once you do that you won't have to interact with me ever again.
Fiji:...Deal.
Egypt: Hey...guys...don't look at Mum.
Den: Screw you, I'm looking!
Cam: Don't do it, Den. Egypt knows the future!
Den: Right right...oh wait, maybe he was right.
Gunther: Wow...Elin...
Elin: Not happening.
Cam: Why didn't Egypt tell me she'd sit with us?
Den: Because he...doesn't like you that much, I guess.
Elin: Hello, horrors.
Elin: Lemme think of something to say...
Fiji: Bring it!
Den: I think I like her.
Don't go in Elin's sex tent! Jeez!
Aw, Elin's hanging out with her little girls.
Elin: Be more like this one, Cambodia.
Fiji: Heehee!
Cam: *sigh*
Gunther: Don't pick favourites between our daughters, Elin?
Cam: Our?
Fiji: Hee hee hee little man!
Cam: Egypt! Did your 'future' let you know that mum was gonna be a right bitch to me?
Egypt: I mean we always knew she's that way, didn't we? Sorry, Cam.
Elin: Maybe he's withholding information to screw with you.
Cam: Uh, that sounds like something YOU would do, Mum! Egypt isn't like that.
Elin: *smirk*
Den: Hehe. I can see his failures. Balance is restored.
Dji: Oh sHIT
Elin: No. I'm done with you.
Kian: But I booked a box and everything...!
Elin: That isn't my problem.
Elin: Splash me again and you'll have some trouble.
Den: Whatever. Nice way to blow off your side piece, by the way. That's the one who put the kid in you this time, I assume?
Elin: Shut up and go play catch-up to your superior brother.
Den: I WILL!
Elin: That isn't defiant!
Dji did it! Woot woot!
By contrast, Denmark is still on level 8. Let's hope he finishes soon.
Elin: Hey, Watcher! This is Gunther work!
Dji: You can't actually tell the future!
Egypt: Prove it!
Dji: What's going to happen tomorrow?
Egypt: Your brother will max out his skills and Mum's gonna pop out another affair baby!
Gunther: What? And boys, stop fighting.
Dji: Shut up Gunther this doesn't concern you.
Gunther: *sigh* At least that one calls me by name...
Dji: Say it! Say I'm better in every way than Denmark!
Egypt: Ehhh....
Egypt: Oh, I'm so dizzy...I mean, ooh, future vision.!
Cam: This's gonna be good.
Dji: Is it now?
Cam: Since when did you get sassy?
Dji: Since 'I'm finished with my skills and on free will before my awful twin', dear Cam.
Egypt: Aren't you silly...dear book? You make a good puppet!
Meanwhile, Elin takes pleasure in Fiji's misery.
Fiji: Blocks are like...hard man... and so is using this potty!
Elin: :) Oh *giggle*, what a shame!
Fiji: *sigh*
Egypt: Do the Cabbage Patch!
Cam: He can't do it.
Elin: Right?
Fiji: Heeeaaave....and I'm on!
Den: Ugh, you're all lame.
Dji: Real nice meatball you got there, Mum, would be a shame if someone were to...
Elin: Steal it? Just try me, son.
Cam: Do you like me for who I am, Bosnia?
Bos: Well, the thing is...ahh...ummm...yeah, sure, why not?
Gunther: Hello, bathroom children.
Dji: Psh. You're in here too, Gunther.
Cam: Seriously, when....
Dji: Come on Cam. It's Gunther. He's lower on the family totem pole than me!
Cam: I guess, but still...!
Den: Hey, cheer up! You're only the third-lamest person in the family!
Ooh, an actual breakup. Normally it's just couples having issues but sticking together anyway.
Akira, you better not come to us. We don't care if you fathered Fiji.
Elin: Hhhheeeyyy I gotta toilet.
You literally have an ensuite, just hurry up.
Egypt: Remember when I predicted I'd finish the social skill? Well, it just happened!
Denmark: *still not finished with his skill despite being older*
Dji: Aha! Den is so lame!
Fiji (you can see her feet on the sofa): *doesn't give a shit, just wants to eat meatballs for breakfast*
Fiji: Yes, change my nappy, little man...it's all you're good for!
Cam: I see why Mum likes her.
Egypt: Yup.
Den: I wasn't that far off OK-
And with that, every child in the house has maxed a skill and is ready to age up next week. I think they'll all be ageing up within one day of each other. It's Sunday; so Cam will age up on Tuesday, Den and Dji on Wednesday, and Egypt on Thursday.
Fiji is pretty close to ageing up too.
Gunther: Who's awesome at running? Oh yeah, me!
Egypt: Not in that outfit you're not.
Cam: Did you even see the outfit?
Egypt: Did I have to?
Dji: *sigh*
Den: Nice bag of poop you've got there, loser.
Dji: What did I do to you, Denmark?
Den: One more word and I rub what's in the bag, in your face.
Dji: I could take you!
Den: Try and I'll stab your little eye with this shark tooth necklace.
Dji: *happily* Hey brooo, you're in Mum's...'special tent'.
Den: Oh God oh God oh God...I mean...whatever. It's not bad in here. This was on purpose.
Dji: Really.
Fiji: Do it! Scrub those dishes, you pathetic nerd!
Den: Haha, sis. I'm not Djibouti.
Fiji: I know.
Cam: Oh God why are his legs so weird? Why are they so weird?
Gunther: Great. That little shit's having her birthday and I had to make the cake.
Bitch, bitch, bitch, Gunther.
Den: Oh. Great. You grew up.
Fiji: I'm not impressed either. These sparkles itch!
Cam: Great, she's the same size as all of the rest of us now.
Not for long, Cam, just hold on.
Cam: And now I've got Gunther and his disgusting body following me.
Elin: Nice one, sweetheart.
Gunther: Says the woman who was walking around in lingerie while six months pregnant!
Elin: Says the woman who owns you!
Fiji: Get him Mum! Drag him to the ground!
Cam: This movie...is...nice.
Fiji: Barely a horror, though. And what's swearwolves?
(If anyone knows where that's from...:D)
Akira: Also I'm sleeping under a bench right now so if you could speak to your mother-
Elin: Fiji hang up the phone now.
Fiji: Already happening!
Wolfgang: Wow, bro, so they're all your kids.
Gunther: Yup! The two who aren't mine have moved out...so it's all of these that are mine.
Wolfgang: Even the Asian-looking girls? The blond one?
Gunther: Yeah...recessive genes and all. Elin knows all about it.
Wolfgang: I'm sure she does.
Elin: You're gonna be a father again!
Wolfgang, just offscreen: Don't you mean stepfather?
Gunther: Hmmm?
Elin: *death-glare*
Guatemala: Whee! Let's goooo!
Elin: No, stay in my arms, sweet child.
Guatemala: *squirming* I need to be free!
Elin: You must stayyyy.
She's like 1 second old and she already wants to escape you, Elin. You really are just wonderful at parenting. Anyway, this is Guatemala, she's the kid of Elin (obviously) and Kian the Klepto Cop.
Elin: *stroking Mala's head with her wedding ring* You're Gunther's daughter, aren't you? You must always believe that, even if you do end up having jet black hair that we clearly don't have.
Next up is another interlude. Hopefully after Cam, Den and Dji move out those become less frequent.
Elin: Not happening.
Cam: Why didn't Egypt tell me she'd sit with us?
Den: Because he...doesn't like you that much, I guess.
Elin: Hello, horrors.
Elin: Lemme think of something to say...
Fiji: Bring it!
Den: I think I like her.
Don't go in Elin's sex tent! Jeez!
Aw, Elin's hanging out with her little girls.
Elin: Be more like this one, Cambodia.
Fiji: Heehee!
Cam: *sigh*
Gunther: Don't pick favourites between our daughters, Elin?
Cam: Our?
Fiji: Hee hee hee little man!
Cam: Egypt! Did your 'future' let you know that mum was gonna be a right bitch to me?
Egypt: I mean we always knew she's that way, didn't we? Sorry, Cam.
Elin: Maybe he's withholding information to screw with you.
Cam: Uh, that sounds like something YOU would do, Mum! Egypt isn't like that.
Elin: *smirk*
Den: Hehe. I can see his failures. Balance is restored.
Dji: Oh sHIT
Elin: No. I'm done with you.
Kian: But I booked a box and everything...!
Elin: That isn't my problem.
Elin: Splash me again and you'll have some trouble.
Den: Whatever. Nice way to blow off your side piece, by the way. That's the one who put the kid in you this time, I assume?
Elin: Shut up and go play catch-up to your superior brother.
Den: I WILL!
Elin: That isn't defiant!
Dji did it! Woot woot!
By contrast, Denmark is still on level 8. Let's hope he finishes soon.
Elin: Hey, Watcher! This is Gunther work!
Dji: You can't actually tell the future!
Egypt: Prove it!
Dji: What's going to happen tomorrow?
Egypt: Your brother will max out his skills and Mum's gonna pop out another affair baby!
Gunther: What? And boys, stop fighting.
Dji: Shut up Gunther this doesn't concern you.
Gunther: *sigh* At least that one calls me by name...
Dji: Say it! Say I'm better in every way than Denmark!
Egypt: Ehhh....
Egypt: Oh, I'm so dizzy...I mean, ooh, future vision.!
Cam: This's gonna be good.
Dji: Is it now?
Cam: Since when did you get sassy?
Dji: Since 'I'm finished with my skills and on free will before my awful twin', dear Cam.
Egypt: Aren't you silly...dear book? You make a good puppet!
Meanwhile, Elin takes pleasure in Fiji's misery.
Fiji: Blocks are like...hard man... and so is using this potty!
Elin: :) Oh *giggle*, what a shame!
Fiji: *sigh*
Egypt: Do the Cabbage Patch!
Cam: He can't do it.
Elin: Right?
Fiji: Heeeaaave....and I'm on!
Den: Ugh, you're all lame.
Dji: Real nice meatball you got there, Mum, would be a shame if someone were to...
Elin: Steal it? Just try me, son.
Cam: Do you like me for who I am, Bosnia?
Bos: Well, the thing is...ahh...ummm...yeah, sure, why not?
Gunther: Hello, bathroom children.
Dji: Psh. You're in here too, Gunther.
Cam: Seriously, when....
Dji: Come on Cam. It's Gunther. He's lower on the family totem pole than me!
Cam: I guess, but still...!
Den: Hey, cheer up! You're only the third-lamest person in the family!
Ooh, an actual breakup. Normally it's just couples having issues but sticking together anyway.
Akira, you better not come to us. We don't care if you fathered Fiji.
Elin: Hhhheeeyyy I gotta toilet.
You literally have an ensuite, just hurry up.
Egypt: Remember when I predicted I'd finish the social skill? Well, it just happened!
Denmark: *still not finished with his skill despite being older*
Dji: Aha! Den is so lame!
Fiji (you can see her feet on the sofa): *doesn't give a shit, just wants to eat meatballs for breakfast*
Fiji: Yes, change my nappy, little man...it's all you're good for!
Cam: I see why Mum likes her.
Egypt: Yup.
Den: I wasn't that far off OK-
And with that, every child in the house has maxed a skill and is ready to age up next week. I think they'll all be ageing up within one day of each other. It's Sunday; so Cam will age up on Tuesday, Den and Dji on Wednesday, and Egypt on Thursday.
Fiji is pretty close to ageing up too.
Gunther: Who's awesome at running? Oh yeah, me!
Egypt: Not in that outfit you're not.
Cam: Did you even see the outfit?
Egypt: Did I have to?
Dji: *sigh*
Den: Nice bag of poop you've got there, loser.
Dji: What did I do to you, Denmark?
Den: One more word and I rub what's in the bag, in your face.
Dji: I could take you!
Den: Try and I'll stab your little eye with this shark tooth necklace.
Dji: *happily* Hey brooo, you're in Mum's...'special tent'.
Den: Oh God oh God oh God...I mean...whatever. It's not bad in here. This was on purpose.
Dji: Really.
Fiji: Do it! Scrub those dishes, you pathetic nerd!
Den: Haha, sis. I'm not Djibouti.
Fiji: I know.
Cam: Oh God why are his legs so weird? Why are they so weird?
Gunther: Great. That little shit's having her birthday and I had to make the cake.
Bitch, bitch, bitch, Gunther.
Den: Oh. Great. You grew up.
Fiji: I'm not impressed either. These sparkles itch!
Cam: Great, she's the same size as all of the rest of us now.
Not for long, Cam, just hold on.
Cam: And now I've got Gunther and his disgusting body following me.
Elin: Nice one, sweetheart.
Gunther: Says the woman who was walking around in lingerie while six months pregnant!
Elin: Says the woman who owns you!
Fiji: Get him Mum! Drag him to the ground!
Cam: This movie...is...nice.
Fiji: Barely a horror, though. And what's swearwolves?
(If anyone knows where that's from...:D)
Akira: Also I'm sleeping under a bench right now so if you could speak to your mother-
Elin: Fiji hang up the phone now.
Fiji: Already happening!
Wolfgang: Wow, bro, so they're all your kids.
Gunther: Yup! The two who aren't mine have moved out...so it's all of these that are mine.
Wolfgang: Even the Asian-looking girls? The blond one?
Gunther: Yeah...recessive genes and all. Elin knows all about it.
Wolfgang: I'm sure she does.
Elin: You're gonna be a father again!
Wolfgang, just offscreen: Don't you mean stepfather?
Gunther: Hmmm?
Elin: *death-glare*
Guatemala: Whee! Let's goooo!
Elin: No, stay in my arms, sweet child.
Guatemala: *squirming* I need to be free!
Elin: You must stayyyy.
She's like 1 second old and she already wants to escape you, Elin. You really are just wonderful at parenting. Anyway, this is Guatemala, she's the kid of Elin (obviously) and Kian the Klepto Cop.
Elin: *stroking Mala's head with her wedding ring* You're Gunther's daughter, aren't you? You must always believe that, even if you do end up having jet black hair that we clearly don't have.
Next up is another interlude. Hopefully after Cam, Den and Dji move out those become less frequent.
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