10.10 - Close to Death

Missy: Finally had that bed all to myself...and I'm STILL tired!

And?

Missy: Right, and I miss my husband and stuff.

Missy: I won't have to miss him for long tho.

Huh, thought these were happening further apart.

Missy: So did I...

Grim did his thing properly this time. I wonder why he'll only do it for Sutherland spouses.

I had Sari plead.

Sahara: Please, not my mum too!...We weren't close but I just lost my dad and I can't-

Grim: So why didn't you get your dad back!

Sahara: I was too overcome with - OK fine, I was in the basement getting it on with my husband.

Grim: Well, too bad. This family does not have enough good karma for these pleas, out of my way!

And with that, Missy was gone.

RIP to Missy, queen of pregnancy brain, naps, somewhat a stereo troll and...something to Mason. Was she a great parent? No. Was she a great career woman? Also no. But she was fun to have around and I'll miss her.

Apparently overnight, between the two deaths, the twins were grief-grilling. The dish on the left is Tosca's doing, and on the right is Tristan's. Surprised neither of them set a fire, given their terrible moods.

Tristan: Must cook. Never eat. My GRANDPARENTS used to eat.

They also cooked. Mason was an excellent cook.

Sari wasn't close to either of her parents, but their deaths did hit her hard. This morning Dylan's been talking to her constantly, trying to cheer her up. And of course, he's done this.

Dylan: Just to warn you, I'm not a trained masseuse.

Sari: That's OK, you being here is enough. Plus the right pair of hands makes up for lack of technique.

I think it was at this point that I acknowledged these two were on the level of Glasston.

Sari: Who?

Xavier: You think you're SOOOO special, being a mermaid-

Tosca: I just wanna sleep, Xav.

Xavier: -well I can float too!

Not while you're asleep.

Xavier: I'm about to be! I am very tired!

Not again.

Dylan isn't as good as dealing with his children's feelings as he is with Sari's.

Dylan: So...how are we doing?

Catalina: Dad we've never had that kind of relationship and I'm not in the mood to start.

Dylan: Well, it was a big night. A sad night. I'm pretty shaken up too.

Catalina: And I'm doing dishes, leave me alone.

To be fair on him, Cat doesn't make it easy...

Dylan: Which might be my fault.

Which is definitely your fault.

Dylan: I know how it feels. I lost my parents too. It'll suck but we'll get through it.

Sari: Thanks, Dyl...

Obviously he's doing this autonomously. I adore these two.

Tosca: Right, just gonna change into a person-

Xavier: Drowning, you're right, the answer is drowning please control me!

Bit late.

Also WHAT THE HELL.

Tosca: No, Xavier! You're too young to die! *sniff* Why didn't I do anything?

It's not your fault, he was about to pass out and jumped in, as you were transforming.

Tosca: *sob* It's my fault!

Sari: You told me to go outside. I can sense Grim behind me. What's happened?

Just hurry to the pool.

Sari: I can't do this again.

Grim: Ugh, same, I'm tired. Someone punch my loyalty card.

Sari: Not the time, Grim!

Miles: Sari, I...

Sari: I'm not going to look because this isn't happening.

Miles: Denial isn't going to change this.

Sari: I mean it. Dad prepared for this kind of thing.

Miles: Well he made that ambrosia...

Sari: And what about the botanical ingredient?

Grim: How the hell did you get one of these?

Sari: Talk to my dad, he crossed into your realm last night. Now give me back my son.

Death flowers!

Xavier: Ow my neck...couldn't this be more comfortable? And who's in the pool? That's really insensitive.

Sari: Yeah, he's back.

Xavier: Nice, I'm like Jesus.

Tosca: What the FUCK? I feel like I've been punched in the chest about five times straight!

Well, your brother's alive.

Tosca: I can see that. Guess I woulda really missed the little shit. I'll protect him forever now, he nearly died 'cos of me.

Tristan: I heard all the wailing, came as fast as I could!

Xavier: Active my ass, you're way late. Mum already used some freaky flower to save me.

Grim: Why are you still in the pool?

Xavier: I mean now I get why Mum jumped in here, it's quite relaxing after a harrowing experience.

Xavier: Why did the general fire this space laser?

Idk.

Xavier: Thanks for playing along. He was committing war crimes! Good joke, right?

...Sure. I'll be nice 'cos you just died. You seem to be recovering well from that.

Xavier: Why let a little death bring you down?

Dylan's sad mood lapsed, and Sari's was negated by her use of the death flower. So they happily played/listened to music.

Dylan: You seem better! What happened?

Sari: It's a long story, I'll tell you once my heartbeat slows some.

Dylan: Sure, I'll just listen to the music of the most talented woman in the world.

Sari: Oh you.

Tristan: -so, just lay off Xavier today, OK? He's had a hard one.

Catalina: Well sure, I was really scared there for a minute. You should have clarified at the start of the story that he didn't actually die.

Tosca: What a day, huh?

Tristan: Tossie get your arm out of that thing, I don't need anymore of this.

Tosca: Please, it's harmless clipping. A total illusion.

Later, Cat came out to mourn her grandmother. Or rather, her great-grandfather because that's the icon showing up in her queue.

She's also very far away.

Catalina: I don't want their *sniff* idiocy staining me! I've heard of him, and I knew enough about her!

Danika's also having a baby!

Plus, Aaliyah's son is having a second child with his wife.

Xavier: That's right, dibs on the bathroom, I nearly died, it's only right...

Tristan: I bet he milks this for ages.

Tosca: How can you say that about our dear little brother who almost-

Tristan: *squawk*

Tosca: Your dolphin impression disgusts me. Yeah, that's way worse, you're probably right about the first thing.

Wh- what are you doing?

Tristan: Getting in the bath, I have scale rot coming on.

But you're behind it.

Tristan: Doesn't matter.

Seriously, this boy just climbed in straight through the wall. Glitchy-ass save.

Tristan: Nah, that's no glitch, I'm just magical.

Xavier: Why is he going outside at 4.30?

Tosca: Why were you going in the pool when you were about to pass out?

Xavier: Touche. But seriously?

Tosca: He did not experience the euphoria of your resurrection and thus, the deaths of our grandparents still affect him.

Xavier: What does that-

Tosca: Grief-grilling, fam.

Xavier and Tosca got in a slap-fight.

Xavier: How dare you?

Tosca: You started it!

Xavier: And I almost DIED yesterday!

Tosca: Goddammit kid, now I have to admit Tristan was RIGHT. I'll slap you for real this time.

Tosca: Meh, you're no threat. You're small and cute. Pat pat.

Xavier: Piss off!

Dylan: Can't get enough of the Dylmachine, huh?

Sahara: Of course not. Babe. Talk to me for a second, what do you think about another kid...

Dylan: We did so well with the last four...

Sahara: Is that sarcasm?

Dylan: Well, you know I always wanna make you happy. You've got the itch?

Sahara: Yeah.

Dylan: Then let's do this.

Sari: Woohooo! This is happening?

Was THAT sarcasm?

Sari: A little bit!!!!

Tristan: UGGHHH I'm so hungry!

Xavier: He saddens me.

Catalina: I can't believe you're the closest thing I have to an equal around here.

Xavier: Of course not you could never get on my level.

Catalina: Too high a climb even for me.

Xavier:....I died yesterday.

Catalina: Hardly.

The face of an overjoyed man.

Dylan: I'm getting flashbacks.

Sari: No taking this back now, babe.

One of Dylan's scary-looking relatives came to visit.

Korbin: I help you...you help me.

Yes yes. *pulls up MC Dresser*

(Wish I could help with that schnoz though)

Xavier: Hey look, it's me and Les Miserables!

Tosca: You're not funny.

Tristan: I'm so tired I...can't think of a good consequence.

Catalina: I'm still better than all of you.

Quelle surprise.

-5, Tosca.

Tosca: Don't...care.

Her faces are still my favourite.

Tosca: You all disgust me you cretins!

Living room furniture: What did we DO?

Tosca: You know what you did, just be better!

Hours later, when all the other kids are asleep, Xavier is once again the most functional.

Xavier: And productive. I truly am the best of them.

In terms of tonight? Low bar little man.

Sari: Ah, the guitar, my true great love. Anyway, here's Wonderwall-

Please don't.

Sari: I got a promotion and I can celebrate how I like.

Sure, just not like that.

Everyone's really getting old. Cousin Andrew's stepson just married...Aaliyah's eldest daughter, seen here in a very stupid hat.

Eh, at least they're not blood-related.

Catalina: I can't BELIEVE you're in this bathroom!

Tristan Am I...not supposed to be?

Catalina: God you're clueless.

Tristan: I'm...confused.

Catalina: And fun to mess with. But seriously, can you please leave I wanna pee.

Dylan: Afterlife getting you down, huh?

Bentley: So it's true. You're the one they call...truly stupid.

Dylan: No way. I married into this family, my wife and I are having another baby...I couldn't be smarter.

Bentley: I've haunted this place a lot. I've seen things. I have some disputes.

Xavier: What do you call a movie directed by a goose?

Catalina: I don't know? The Honkening?

Xavier: Bad. You call it bad. What the hell are you watching?

Catalina: Hey, I was having a great time on my own here, you're the one who crashed my party.

Xavier: Ah, but this family needs my wisdom.

Catalina: So give it to someone else!

Tosca: Aren't we supposed to put clothes on in the common areas?

Sari: You're in your swimsuit.

Tosca: That's different.

Sari: Anyway cut me some slack I'm pregnant.

Tosca: Ew, why?

Sari: I'm creating life-

Tosca: I mean why the hell are you pregnant again?

Found the graves of Mason and his mum in the goddamn household inventory. Wish I'd figured that out earlier. Maybe they'll come out.

Tosca doesn't like this idea.

Tosca: Please! Cs get degrees? More like Cs get GEDs! I'm good, thanks.

She still did her homework.

Dylan: I can help you, y'know-

Tosca: I'm good, dad. Just go dance. And help me figure out how to turn off that lightshow thingy here, it's shining at me right in the eyeballs!

She later tries to bond with her little siblings.

Tosca: Yeah, so I guess you two are like the smart bitches club, and you guys talk about movies and maths and stuff-

Xavier: I've never been more saddened than I am now, and our grandparents died this weekend. Nearly followed by me. What say you, Catalina?

Catalina: I say nothing. I'm not entertaining her nonsense.

Dylan: How DARE you?

Tosca: What? What's your problem?

Dylan: This shirt does NOT make my butt look big!

Tosca: Relax, ass is in vogue!

Dylan was hurt so deeply he had to retreat to his bed to sob.

Dylan: And my sister died last night.

That too.

Mercy's kid Shannon is pregnant.

As are Lana's kid Roxanne and Aaliyah's kid Mikayla.

Plus Lux's son adopted a daughter with his wife.

Hi Zen, been a while!

Zenobia: I can't believe it...so many missed opportunities to haunt and terrorise this dang family! It's just disappointing,

Right.

Zenobia: And that airhead Missy's in my realm now!

If you think she's airheaded, wait until you see who Sari married.

Zenobia: I knew this family would decay without me.

Eh, they're the same level of dysfunctional as ever.

The Morning...

Sari is nearing her third trimester.

Sari: Ew, Toast, you should never say that to a lady! I hardly look pregnant.

...

Dylan: Dibs on not telling her!

Good call.

Tosca: UH-OH!

I simply adore her faces.

Tosca: Eggs, don't be mad at me, I'm sure the stove isn't that hot!

Dylan this isn't a back float, you're just drowning yourself.

Dylan: Well Sari and the twins do it!

They're mermaids!

Dylan: They're not better than me, I can do this too!

Sigh. Like father, like son.

Xavier, from school: DON'T YOU DARE

Third trimester Sari is...

Sari: Maybe I look a bit pregnant. Just a bit. The guitar totes covers it tho. I'm your-our-ours-

Kids are home, and Auntie Tamsin's over.

Tamsin: Hello niecephews. Is that mermaid blood I smell?

Tosca: You can just take it out of my vein, not absorb me.

Tristan: Yeah you better not call again, punk!

Tamsin: Wooow, who's he fighting with?

Tosca: That's the principal's office.

Tamsin: Oh, this family hasn't changed a bit.

Sari: Hi, come in, come in, computers are open methinks...

Tamsin: Why are you pregnant again.

Sari: Y'know everybody keeps saying that!

Xavier: My suspicions were correct, nobody in my family has any damn boundaries.

Sari: Don't be silly, you were only washing your hands. I could hear the sink go. Now, do you have questions about my latest pregnancy or...

Xavier: My questions are endless, mother.

Xavier: What do you call a girl of average intelligence who tries to do homework above her grade level? A failure.

Catalina: Please. I'm siting here because it's the head of the table. And I'm way above you.

Xavier: Huh. That's Tosca's book isn't it?

Catalina: Wanna look through it and laugh at her?

Xavier: Absolutely.

These two have a weird bond, but I think they're the closest of the kids. Even including the twins' bond with each other.

It's Cat's birthday!

Tristan: Sigh, nothing in the room but me and my delicious cereal...

Catalina: Typical. Not that I want his attention.

Catalina: Huuuurrrr.

Nice birthday face, girl. Let's get you madeover.

Here's her makeover! She got Dance Machine and Leader of the Pack.

Catalina: If I can find imbeciles like my family, they won't be so hard to lead.

I gave her a hipstery makeover in the style of the Get Together pack. The hat and boots are from it.

Meanwhile, Sari has been soundtracking the family all night. I got her some reward traits and a Moodlet solver because I'm sick of how slow her skills are going.

...Yet I made her get pregnant.

Yeah I'm not smart.