Mason: See! I can bond with you guys too! Like the others. I belong here!
Blarffy: Actually it's just you and Ali who are nice to us...the others generally just punch or shout at us.
Brad: I still got it!...also, hi from Quinton to the bottles? He really wanted me to say that.
Zenobia: I didn't do it! It was a ghost! Probably my dumbass dad...
This is also when I realised that the family, when combining the house and savings they have 600,000! So +20!
Zen: This is NOT my idea of a Sunday Funday!
You're TH. Fundays come later.
Zen: I haven't done this in ten years!
...Which is exactly why you should start now.
Zen: Uuuuuggghhh.
Lux: *laughing* Isn't he such an idiot?
Bentley: Uh...I haven't even done anything yet.
Lux: Yeah, but we know you're gonna do something stupid.
Bentley and Ali are having the most awkward father-daughter breakfast in existence.
Bentley: So...kid...
Aaliyah: You're my dad? I'd forgotten.
Bentley: OK, sometimes a man just needs to spend all day out on the lawn slide-
Aaliyah:...
Bentley: So do you like...dolls or something?
Aaliyah: Not really. That thing's been broken for years. I like to cry over the dolls.
Bentley: You're a weird kid.
Aaliyah: Did you expect different out of me?
Bentley: Maybe? I dunno. I thought you might be more functional than the children of that idiot Blaze.
Aaliyah:...I fucking love dollhouse tears.
Danika: I will not pass on the message, she doesn't think you're cool and she still won't hang out with you, Groot.
Ebony: No more creepy moments, and I'll reluctantly give you a hug sometimes, kid. Is that good enough for you?
Mason: Acceptance!
Zenobia: Aw. Haven't we raised such strange children?
Ebony: Raised? You barely come near us! I raised this kid!
Bentley: Burn!
Mason: Shut up Dad, you forgot I was your son.
Bentley:...Oh right, I have a - I mean. I always knew that! *cough*
Ebony: Aha, you're crying!
Danika: OK Eb, we get it! You're mean! Now shut up, I'm trying to work.
Aaliyah: Oh woe is me! I have possibly the worst life out of everyone in this house! Why why why?
Danika: Bitch you know that isn't true.
Danika:...I can hear her sobbing!
Ebony: That makes you happy?...That's cold, Dani.
Danika: Not happy...vindicated. Pleasured? A nice warm feeling spreading through-
Ebony: You really are one of us!
Zenobia: '-I can promise you the returns of a lifetime' - what do you think, Bent? Too much?
Bentley: What? I don't care. Why does our kid seem to live in bathrooms?
Zenobia: Which one is that?
Bentley: The boy.
Zenobia: Nice you're acknowledging him.
Bentley: Hah, I've got the best view in the house.
Zenobia: You SERIOUSLY couldn't use another bathroom? This is really breaking my concentration.
Ebony: Hey, lil fire man...just remem'er that the bar was dirty when I got here, 'kaykay? Dis wasnn me.
Fire Man: Girl why are you that out of it, you had one tiny drink.
MOOD.
I'm such a lightweight...oh well you don't care on with
Aaliyah: -you took pleasure in my misery! I do not wish for this hug to happen.
Danika: Yeah, well...I've been stuck here for decades and sometimes it gets to me. Sorry. Reluctant, infrequent and awkward hugging is this family's affection currency. Do you want affection?
Aaliyah: Yes...I do really need some affection. *sigh* Lay it on me.
Mason: Needing the bathroom?
Danika: Do you just live in these things? Get out and stop being a weirdo, Mason!
Mason: N-no, I swear I don't live in this - it's just the Watcher's bad timing!
Danika: I could blame the Watcher for a lot...but not for that. That's your problem.
Mason:...Does that mean you accept me?
Danika: What? Seriously...what?
Mason: Heeeeyyyyy!
Aaliyah: I just don't feel like anyone respects my feelings - oh God, what is it bro? I don't care.
Blarffy: Shut up Mason, I'm finally a proper therapist! This kid really deals with her feelings.
Danika: I'm going to do to this house what this house has done to me!
*looks at queue* Oh fuck no. Just go see Blarffy or something.
Danika: HE'S NOT A THERAPIST! *swan dives into the bath-shower*
Lux: A plate is about to materialise on my outstretched hand. Now, get out of my space and this room, or I'll beat your chinless little face with it.
Mason:...Bye!
Lux: You too, Ali, I need some peace!
Aaliyah: Seriously? I wasn't even doing anything and I was NOT part of the Bathroom Incident!...This is bullshit. I gotta talk to the bear-apist. Ha. Wait. That was awful.
Lux: Yeah it was, get out!
Aaliyah: OK, I'm leaving!
Aaliyah:...Mason get out, this is confidential stuff.
Mason: I knew it. I could guess!
Aaliyah: Oh look at you you little wonderboy. I'm so impressed...not. Out.
Blarffy: Yeah come on, I'm in a session.
Mason: You do know you're not actually a therapist?
Blarffy and Aaliyah: Shut UP.
Mason: I brought my friend.
Danika: Yeah, after that minor Bathroom Incident we're not friends, Mason. Drago, you won't believe this, I've had the worst day-Ali, get out. Therapy.
Aaliyah: This is bullshit.
Blarffy: That's life, my dear.
Bentley: Oh wow, I do have a son...I mean...I knew that. All along. I have always known you weren't a stray that Zen or Ebony picked up! I have never once thought you were-
Mason: I'm going to end this hug.
Zenobia:...It's nice to just sit back and watch my wonderful husband cooking for us all.
Ebony: I hope he starts a fire.
Zenobia: Don't drag everyone down to your level, dear.
Bentley: Look who was successful on the grill.
Ebony: What a smug bastard. Right, Aaliyah?
Aaliyah: I don't need to get involved in petty bullshit.
Bentley: Aw thanks, Ali. I knew one of my kids loved me.
Aaliyah: Whatever, Dad.
Ebony: Hah!
Ebony: I finally get to leave!
Even with her YA makeover, she really doesn't look that different.
Ebony 'Little Eb' Sutherland is not eligible for TH, as she rolled the Ambitious trait, making her a mean, jealous, ambitious woman. She was moved in with Mercy, as currently Mercy only has herself, her husband and their foetus living in the house.
Ebony: *closes eyes and sighs* Living with HER?
Zen: My portrait lies! I am not happy about this!
I'm not exactly jumping for joy either!
Lana's gonna be a grandma too. I guess Nadia's ancient wife died, and now she is free to get knocked up by faceless men...and probably ditched.
Also I checked MC Pregnancy and Zenobia isn't pregnant. Thank GOD. I cba to deal with more spawn this generation.
Ida: No screw you!
Drago: I don't have to deal with this! I have a PHD!
Blarffy: Well...ya really don't, Drago. Let's not take this whole therapist thing too far.
Jayden: Give me an Easter Egg bitch.
Aaliyah: N-NOOOO! I need the bathroom too! Mason how could you?
Mason: I don't owe you people anything. And there are other bathrooms!
Aaliyah: THIS IS A DISASTER!
Mason: You are so dramatic.
Bentley is of course out here. It's only 6.45am dude.
Bentley: Hey waterslide? Never gonna give you up-
Nope!
Lux: You're the best thing that's ever happened to me!
Zenobia:...Huh?
Lux: And so tasty!
Zenobia: Lux that is wrong on so many levels-
Lux: French Toast, you help me get through being stuck here with my idiot family...especially that bitch Zenobia!
Zenobia:...I forget how insane she is.
Lux: And most importantly, it's just you and I, Toast Man!
Zenobia: Oh you know I'm here, little girl. I swear I'll-
You're not going to do anything to her.
Mason: *sob*
Uni: Damn, man. Maybe I could book you in?
Dino: You guys aren't actually therapists, y'know that, right?
Uni: Oh NOW you decide to NOT be a nonsensical bitch.
Dino: So you admit that I was making sense?
Uni: Wha - NO! We hate you.
Lux: I don't want to listen to this bullshit.
Aaliyah: HA-HA-HA-HA-
Danika: -not like I've had that lesson sixty times before, I didn't ask to be five for seventy whole years and I definitely didn't ask for guardians who don't just move me up at least ONE damn grade-
Lux: For once I envy Eb. All she did was tote babies around and scowl, but at least she got to leave.
Danika: May I point out that all you do is...just scowl, basically? Scowl and take shedloads of baths?
Aaliyah: OHOHO BURN! Right, Hedgey?
Lux:...I hate you both.
Zenobia: Maybe NOW these idiots will begin to respect me!
...Doing shit like this on the street and smelling like a dumpster won't help!
Zenobia: *hisses at me* And whose fault is that?
Also it's the complete lack of respect you have for anyone around you.
Zenobia: ...
Lux: I've drunk my energy tea and posted something bullshit to Simsta! It has five likes!
OK?
Lux: Seriously, I have a loooot of energy. +2 moodlet and all.
Great.
Lux:...I'm gonna go sit on my ass and send people anonymous Twitter hate. And text Groot some facts about his own life.
Good plan. *sigh*
Aaliyah: One dish, yeeeaahhh...wait hang on, I thought we ditched that part of my personality.
Meh. You can be dramatic and dish-obsessed at the same time.
Aaliyah:...Excellent. *small evil laugh*
Lux: -no I'm fine y'all, you SHOULDN'T worry-
Zenobia: Don't worry, dear, I wasn't.
Lux: I've talked to all the cool objects, I cleared some plates, and flaming Groot online loses its edge after a while...
Do something useful then!
Lux: Psh.
Danika: Oh niece and nephew! Who wants to hear me talk about my day?
Aaliyah: You can deal with this one, bro.
Mason: *grimace* Why me?
Danika: I mean, you know I know my phonetics, right?
Mason: Yeah, sure-
Danika: And I've been top of the class for sixty-five years now, why do I even have to go to school-
Mason: That girl is a bitch, yeah!
Danika: What.
Mason: What?
Danika: Are you even listening?
Mason: Well you see, I think you should talk to your Mum-
Danika: So it's a no on that front then.
Lux: JESUS TAKE THE WHEEL.
Aaliyah: *sobbing*
Dino: And there never was a tale of more woe, than this dumbass kid Aaliyah and...dammit, can't think of a rhyme.
Uni: She didn't ask for a narrator, Dino.
Zenobia: Fuck plates. After the day I've had, I'm just gonna eat gnocchi straight out of the pot and not give an f.
What kind of day? You went to work, did your daily task, and the kids were dumb. That's all that happened.
Zenobia:...See it's just my general life is stressful-
Lux: Make it stop.
No can do, sweetie.
Would you idiots stop napping, it's 11.30. Go and have some proper sleep.
Aaliyah: Oh brother, I'm gonna go outside and play by the road at 11.30 unsupervised!
Mason: *snore* I don't care....!
Ebony: Seriously? They still haven't moved that urn...and remind me why I'm back here. Ugh.
Nice to see you too, Eb.
Ebony: And the Watcher's still in my face? Great.
Oh, it's you.
Glass: What's wrong with me? Shatter forever, baby.
I just wish other ghosts would spawn once in a while, ya feel me?
Aaliyah: It's 1am. Maybe we should go inside.
Mason: This is the happiest I've been in my life.
Aaliyah:...You know what, same.
That's...nice.
Ebony:...What? This is still my house.
Says every spoiled rich legacy Sim when they realise the house they were screaming to leave has some really nice shit in it.
Ebony:...What was that? Can't hear you over this massive amount of chill.
Aaliyah: Truly, I am the modern Cinderella.
You say, as you clean one puddle and are ignored and mistreated at the same level as your siblings, half and full alike.
Aaliyah:...It's hard work, OK? This broom is twice as tall and about as heavy as I am!
No-one asked you to do this Aaliyah!
Ebony: Hey, squirt. How messed up have you grown up?
Mason: It's 'k. I've been called a bathroom child for two years now and I'm getting used to it, plus Aaliyah isn't terrible so...
Ebony:...Glad to hear it, I guess. Annoying as it was being the only person who looked out for your wellbeing, I did grow attached to you.
Ebony: Hey, hey sis!
Lux: Wha - Ebony quit spraying me you stupid bitch! Get out of here!
Ebony: I'm cleaning the bed.
Lux: And I thought we'd got rid of you and your dumbass.
Ebony: Whatever, slide chick! I would think you'd be more grateful considering how NOBODY cleans around here!
Lux: Wh - I - UGH!
Mason: *doing pushups* Let's get down to business...
Aaliyah: *hears him* To defeat the - no, I'm not encouraging this.
Would you go to bed?
Aaliyah: MY SOUL IS REPRESENTED BY THIS LONG-BROKEN DOLLHOUSE! *bawls*
Mason: ...I just want to be powerful, why don't guys get it?
Blarffy: Why don't you get a less flimsy motivation, you little weirdo?
Uni: WOW Blarffy-
Dino: I mean DAMN-
Blarffy and Uni: Shut up, Dino.
Mason: I will explode people!
Aaliyah: Did we do this already? If not, woo, that happened this generation, good for us.
Zenobia: So, I recently downloaded Candy Crush-
Bentley: You said you were going discuss logic puzzles with me.
Danika: See, brother-in-law? This is your life. This is what you married.
Aaliyah:...
Danika: *fork clinking*
Aaliyah: So....do you wanna move up?
Danika:...Not really.
Aaliyah: Oh, thank God, I didn't want that either.
Heyyyy, for the first time Zenobia's default work outfit works for her!
Zen: Hell yeah fellas, take a look at this. *raises leg, waggles eyebrows*
*shudder* Just go to work.
Aaliyah: I'm hungry and I'm definitely not getting married!
Lux: You foreshadowing something, Ali?
Danika: One of those thought bubbles is mine and you know it!
Aaliyah: Nuh-uh! I'm a complex creature and can have more than one thought at once!
Danika: Sure, but you can't go against game mechanics, stupid!
Lux: Kindly debate this when your heads aren't pressing on my heart, kids.
Lux: This is the only safe place to do my exercise!
Lux you and Danika are the only awake people, there is no need to hide. Do you just like it in here?
Lux: Pff! What do you take me for? A bathroom teen or something?
Right now, kinda.
Zenobia: -Do you know who I am? Because I can wreck you!
...
Zenobia: -We're not - well, all - crazy!
Ebony:...If you pay for the drinks, that is.
Zenobia: Screw off and get some financial independence.
Lux: You guys are hilarious! Bunny is just so sly...
Bentley: What's up with our step/daughter?
Zenobia: Just parent like you usually do.
Lux: -Dragon's kind of more WRY now...
Bentley: We normally kind of...ignore them now they can take care of their basic physical needs.
Zenobia: Bing-fucking-o, Bents.
Bentley:...Psh! I wish you were out of this world!
Groot: *whimper*
Bentley: I - I'm so sorry! Oh my God. I'm sorry. Zen told me to sorry bye! *hangs up*
Lux: Damn am I loving these links Aunty Mercy sent.
Oh dear.
Ebony: Hey, if she dies she can be saved from that horrible outfit.
Iris: *cough* That's the pot - *wheeze* calling the kettle *groan* black!
Ebony: Really. Those were your last words.
Ebony: Much better. I'm happy now. Thanks, Watcher.
Iris: Can you do what you did for her for me?
Ebony: Haha, no! Mine was just one of those weird outfits containing stuff from the vampire pack, That's your everyday, bitch!
What she said. Now hurry up and die.
Iris:...Thanks.
LMAO Lux.
Lux: What? Rock-a-bye baby is my jam.
I actually really like this teen. She's pretty.
Kristin: Pentagrams are here to stay. For ALL my life.
Mariska: Ooh, girl, I hope not.
Kristin: Hope not - why?
Mariska: You'll see.
Grim still isn't done after reaping Iris, I see.
Grim: On my way to steal your soul.
Christopher: O shit wad - wait seriously what? I'm just a boy! Please don't take me yet!
Zenobia: OK, so if I hold the spherical apple down with this knife and jimmy it with this other knife...it'll work! Boom, physics!
Mason: Screw the burger, I'm getting out of here.
Zenobia: Why is that...uh - Child Four?
Mason: Nice. Real nice. You do realise one of us is going to get stabbed in the eye? Aren't you supposed to be like Level 8 in cooking or something?
Lux: Ugh. Mum's happy and I'm sleepy and hungry. Today is just the worst.
Zen: - we should totally do that thing with the peppers.
Bentley: Hells yeah.
Lux: I'm getting out of here.
Zen: Yes. Please do that. Bye now!
She took a vacation day today so I figured I'd let her actually interact with another human before I chain her to skilling objects all day.
Bentley: I'm going to clean this counter!
Tea Machine in the background: It's not fair! Help me out!
Bentley:...Gotta work, ya see...
Aaliyah: Heh.
Mason: You think this is fun? My retina is being damaged by your freaking HAIR.
Danika: I don't even...
Lux: I thought in me would be where you'd like to be, Mason.
Danika: Ew.
Aaliyah: HAH!
Mason: I was FIVE! The Bathroom Incident is not my entire personality!
Lux: Iss going down...*snore*
Yay. Minus five.
Mason: Ah, enjoying this burger in pea-
Danika outside at the dartboard, throwing darts: Fuck you Zenobia! Fuck you and your pathetic family and your ageing and I'm glad you're getting fat!
Mason: Never mind.
Wow! A kid is actually doing homework.
Mason:...I can still hear her. I'm not sure if the dartboard is a healthy coping mechanism.
Lux: I'd rather die - and how am I talking? I'm asleep.
Blaze: You were always special, honey!
Lux: Shut UP, you mother-in-law banging slut.
Blaze: She wasn't my mother-in-law y-
Lux: That doesn't make it better!
Aaliyah: Peace at last.
Mason: Right?
Aaliyah: I bet someone comes outside soon.
Mason: Unfortunately. Now shut up, I need to soak up some quiet.
Aaliyah: No can do, you gotta hear about this little bitch-
Zen's jealous side appears to be showing.
Zenobia: Who is this bitch? Who do I have to ask/pay Mercy to cut?
Bentley: Nobody, nobody-
Zenobia: So who's this 'Megan' girl who gave you 'cake'?
Bentley: That wasn't a euphemism! It was Jim's birthday!
Zenobia: Right, so she brought in a cake for her...co-worker? Bullshit! Who does that?
Bentley: Lots of people, actually, you're quite the except-
Zenobia:...I don't believe you.
Bentley: Making out with my shirt isn't going to help with anything.
Zen: Shut up.
Aaliyah: The thumb is the best digit and you better agree with me or I'll scream LOUDER?
Mason: No way, sis. Index. Fingers.
I guess they're still Sutherlands.
I...guess they made up.
Zenobia: -I don't care if you really enjoy office parties, Bentley, just watch yourself!
aBSOLUTELY NOT.
Lux: *stares intently*
Danika: *pauses mid-fruit-salad bite* What?
Lux: I mean...you're dead.
Danika: Congratulations, genius.
Lux:...But why do you eat food?
Danika: Why do you eat food?
Lux: I need it to survive?
Danika: Exactly.
Lux: But I - wha -
Is this kind of gross? Yes. Can I be bothered to fix it? No.
Have fun together, you guys.
Nadia and Nicholas: *don't get dialogue because I never bothered to visit and so didn't establish any characteristics for them*
Hot damn Mariska! Just...getting all the young guys. Well. Two of them.
Mariska: Ha! And Lana was all 'oh, you should have married the last baby daddy' but who's winning now? Bitch.
Next time, Aaliyah, Mason and Lux all have birthdays.
Score Sheet- 80
Single Births (27) +135
Twin Births (4) +40
Aspiration Tiers (67) +335
Aspiration (10) +100
Grade A (7) +35
Randomising everything for 1 gen (5) +50
Not using spare's satisfaction points (6) +60
Every 100,000 simoleons (6) +120
Immortalise TH (1) +5
Autonomous Skill Max (2) +20
Pass Out (110) -550
Self Wetting (30) -150
Fires (12) -120
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